A very popular topic of women's psychological training, stating that all the troubles and lack of privacy based on the fact that women do not like myself , do not understand themselves, can not accept yourself. Let's try to understand what we mean, what steps should be taken in this regard and what to do about this now?
What usually happens in such training? What are the demands of women come to such events?
As a rule, come to those who do not work to build healthy relationships with men. Some time later, after a series of failed experiments or even because of their absence, the girls appear sentiments such as "I'm no use to anybody," "I will not like me," "I come across some goats, I have some not so" .
Then catch the eye saving slogans. It turns out that just need to love yourself, accept yourself for who you are, and life just get better!
In search of a cure for depression, a kind of magic wand, girls go for training.
What do they do there and in the end get?
As a rule, training begins with sentimental stories of the participants, which they share with each other and with the coach (usually - a woman, because only she can understand the kind of thin female nature), a story worse and another pitiful. For some girls, too, had the opportunity to talk to gives relief. Others listened to other people's stories, understand that they have not so bad. Already good.
Women are very emotional, experiential. It uses healers shower, urging participants to reveal their sensuality, accept their femininity and love yourself. And it's all on the level of emotion, but not at the level of understanding. Yes, the girls think that they realize what it was about, but each of them in these concepts puts something of his own, based on his impressions of life. A number of compliments that women are exchanged for the training, the participant creates a kind of illusory reality in which she feels comfortable and confident. What finally gets it? We call it "self-confidence", ie just confidence in the fact that now she'll be fine.
Inspired, discover their true essence zheskie, she plunges into everyday life. Energy self for a while by inertia, provides an incentive to new undertakings, creates a good mood, emotional brightness. At this point, it is necessary to act!
But what happens next? On the spiritual level, she fell in love with himself, but the behavior, habits, knowledge, lifestyle - remained the same. Then disappointment comes again, it ends fuse confidence. There comes a time called "training - it's all nonsense," or "go further I'll go to training, and that is something I like myself again stopped."
The situation is very similar to the treatment of gastric ulcers. As soon as she found out, from that moment you become a regular customer gastroenterologist. Several times a year you will experience a worsening, and the doctor will kindly rush to your aid. After all, now you and your money with them for life. And he never will not tell you that there is a method that for one procedure will save you from this disease once and for all. So in training - some of them can walk the entire life fueled at the time of positive emotions. Therefore, my appeal to you. Going to the event, read the first training program to your output just need positive emotions, energy, charge, or you want to get a set of specific actions that will be embedded into your life? What should include helpful training called "love yourself"?
Let's start with definitions. Let's look at the concept of "love yourself", "accept yourself", "to understand myself."
It would seem that so tough.
Each person has advantages and disadvantages. Many women believe that "love and accept myself" - is to leave everything as it is, you just need to stop berating yourself for shortcomings, remember that there are advantages and leave it at that. And then you can sit in anticipation that there will be the one who will love her so, what it is. Alas, this is a road to nowhere. After all, the man - not the parents who love us unconditionally. In assessing themselves, their advantages and disadvantages, we are guided by certain rules and regulations dictated by society.
Therefore, to begin with, you need to self-register all its advantages and disadvantages, a list on paper. Perhaps this will be the first step to "understand themselves" .
Then you must "accept yourself", that is to recognize that you have something to love, and there is, what is not to love. Why do it - "accept yourself" ? Perhaps then, that was the starting point to proceed.
When you walk through the swamp - it is better to walk on solid mounds than in the quagmire.
It is important to analyze your list of what you often manifest - a negative or positive way? Often women, aware of its advantages and benefits, they carefully hide, waiting for the men themselves all need to see. For example, under the mask of seriousness - a fun girl with a great sense of humor. Probably, it is necessary to not only the ability to identify at-esteem, but also the ability to properly teach and demonstrate. What about disadvantages? Either start to work with them to minimize or eliminate them, or transfer them to the category of advantages.
What do I need to do?
Walking through the list, schedule yourself goals that will lead you to the desired result, and consistently implement them.
Here it is "love yourself" . That is, do everything in your power to the dignity of all covered the deficiencies that, after working with them will be just minor features. And then you can love themselves for the will to win, due diligence, which will provide you happiness in your personal life precious.
As a rule, if a woman starts to change for the better, just interesting men are around it. And here it is important not to stop there. Learn to easily accept criticism and praise, especially from people who care about you. After all, their evaluation is the most useful for you. After all, they want you there! Continue to work on themselves, find themselves the training that will help you build new skills into practice, to change beliefs on the right, to develop your strengths. Good luck and success.